Maybe I jinxed our relationship by blogging about how much I like her. True, we've never met in public and have only exchanged a handful of e-mails, I still considered Ingrid Mattson someone who, on a basic level, understood me more than a lot of people do. If for no other reason than we are both Muslim women.
I felt part of that slip away yesterday as I watched an archived video of her on YouTube from Ebru TV.
During the latter part of the video, the interviewer asked her about the hijab, to no one's surprise. I got the feeling that she was tired of answering all the same questions. Nonetheless, she addressed it with both intellect and enthusiasm. Only her opinion stands in stark contrast to my own, and because of that, I lost a lot of the enthusiasm I had for watching her speak.
It's no secret that I don't believe the sartorial hijab is an obligatory part of being Muslim for women. I have Qur'anic evidence which backs up my own interpretation, which is that, within reason, women should dress modestly for what is modest in their society. I don't cover, but I also do not expose my legs, arms, or chest area. I don't wear tight clothing, all of my garments are loose fitting. I consider myself to be modestly dressed.
Since there are no clergy in Islam, there is no final authority to go to about what the "right" answer is. I have always, and at this point think I will always, struggle with the idea of hijab. I cannot deny that I am both Eastern and Western, and that these facts directly contradict and influence my ability to make judgments about anything. I have worked hard to eliminate the negative immediately reaction I have to the hijab. I have on many occasions desired and even toyed with the idea of wearing it myself, but I do not possess the reasons to do so. Even if I did, I would maintain that everydya I wore it would be a choice.
Choice....without choice, religion is nothing but a set of rules.
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